conscience

My Chemical Romance

2008-12-04T21:32:00.002+08:00

they are healng me....

Disenchanted

Well I was there on the day
They sold the cause for the queen,
And when the lights all went out
We watched our lives on the screen.
I hate the ending myself,
But it started with an alright scene.
It was the roar of the crowd
That gave me heartache to sing.
It was a lie when they smiled
And said, "you won't feel a thing"
And as we ran from the cops
We laughed so hard it would stingY
eah yeah, oh
If I'm so wrong (so wrong, so wrong)
How can you listen all night long? (night long, night long)
Now will it matter after I'm gone?
Because you never learn a goddamned thing.
You're just a sad song with nothing to say
About a lifelong wait for a hospital stay
Well if you think that I'm wrong,
This never meant nothing to ya
I spent my high school career
Spit on and shoved to agree
So I can watch all my heroes
Sell a car on tv
Bring out the old guillotine
We'll show them what we all mean.
Yeah yeah, oh
If I'm so wrong (so wrong, so wrong)
How can you listen all night long? (night long, night long)
Now will it matter long after I'm gone?
Because you never learn a goddamned thing.
You're just a sad song with nothing to say
About a lifelong wait for a hospital stay
And if you think that I'm wrong,
This never meant nothing to ya
So go, go away, just go, run away.
But where did you run to?
And where did you hide?
Go find another way, price you pay
Woah, woah, woahWoah, woah, woah
You're just a sad song with nothing to say
About a lifelong wait for a hospital stay
And if you think that I'm wrong,
This never meant nothing to ya, come on
You're just a sad song with nothing to say
About a lifelong wait for a hospital stay
Well if you think that I'm wrong,
This never meant nothing to ya
At all, at all, at all, at all...

Famous Last Word

Now I know, That I can't make you stay.But where's your heart? But where's your heart? But where's your, And I know.There's nothing I can say.To change that part.To change that part.To change.So many, Bright lights to cast a shadow, But can I speak? Well is it hard understanding I'm incomplete? A life that's so demanding, I get so weak.A love that's so demanding, I can't speak.I am not afraid to keep on living, I am not afraid to walk this world aloneHoney, if you stay you'll be forgiven; Nothing you can say can stop me going home.Can you say My eyes are shining bright? 'Cause I'm out here, on the other side, Of a jet black hotel mirror, And love so weak.Is it hard understanding I'm incomplete?A love that's so demanding, I get weak.I am not afraid to keep on living, I am not afraid to walk this world aloneHoney, if you stay you'll be forgiven; Nothing you can say can stop me going home.I am not afraid to keep on living, I am not afraid to walk this world aloneHoney, if you stay you'll be forgiven; Nothing you can say can stop me going home.These bright lights have always blinded me.These bright lights have always blinded me.I say, I see you lying next to me, With words I thought I'd never speakAwake and unafraid, Asleep or dead?'Cause I see you lying next to me, (How can I see, I see you lyin')With words I thought I'd never speak(How can I see, I see you lyin')Awake and unafraid, (How can I see, I see you lyin')Asleep or dead?'Cause I see you lying next to me, With words I thought I'd never speakAwake and unafraid, Asleep or dead?'Cause I see you lying next to me, With words I thought I'd never speakAwake and unafraid, Asleep, or dead?I am not afraid to keep on living, I am not afraid to walk this world alone(Or dead)Honey, if you stay you'll be forgiven; Nothing you can say can stop me going home(Or dead)I am not afraid to keep on living, I am not afraid to walk this world alone(Or dead)Honey, if you stay you'll be forgiven; Nothing you can say can stop me going home.(Or dead)I am not afraid to keep on living, I am not afraid to walk this world alone(Or dead)Honey, if you stay you'll be forgiven; Nothing you can say can stop me going home.

roller coaster ride

2008-11-25T09:43:00.002+08:00

i cant imagine how fast things can happen to me in this period of time...
one moment i am at the bottom, i was on top of the world the other..
but now it hit me right on again...
is it really thats complicated...
i hope not...

i wanna spent x'mas with you...

this is a come back

2008-10-24T08:26:00.004+08:00

so, here i am after a few months & been thru alot. some are goods & some bads, other are rather uglys. i just feel that in life if we dont experience all the ups & downs, u are no diff to a salted fish. marvelous stephen.

people just come & go in my life. i have few friends that last long enough to see my pubic grow. but i am that type of person who you treat well, i'll just die for you. how long i know you really doesn't matter, what matter most is that are we go along well, real well. now, i got some friends that i called family, we even rent a place together. are we semi-livingtogether? ha. can it dont come to the end so fast.

ya i am in love with an angel. everybody knew. damn why is it everytime that i fall in love with a wrong person. i hate it. its almost like a year & i still in the same spot. it feel like so sauve & easy in the romance film. com'on, get a grip.

ok so this is my life in a recent few months. by the way, i m currently the performers in disney haunted halloween. just for the info. & i got some special event hahaha. (boing i got special event hahaha).

Thank You Lord

2008-07-03T23:05:00.002+08:00

Thank you, Lord,
for the trials that come my way.
In that way I can grow each day
as I let you lead,
And thank you, Lord,
for the patience those trials bring.
In that process of growing,
I can learn to care.

But it goes against the way
I am to put my human nature down
and let the Spirit take control of all I do.

'Cause when those trials come,
my human nature shouts the thing to do;
and God's soft prompting
can be easily ignored.

I thank you, Lord,
with each trial I feel inside,
that you're there to help,
lead and guide me away from wrong.
'Cause you promised, Lord,
that with every testing,
that your way of escaping is easier to bear.

But it goes against the way
I am to put my human nature down
and let the Spirit take control of all I do.

'Cause when those trials come,
my human nature shouts the thing to do;
and God's soft prompting
can be easily ignored.

I thank you, Lord,
for the victory that growing brings.
In surrender of everything
life is so worth while.
And I thank you, Lord,
that when everything's put in place,
out in front I can see your face,
and it's there you belong.

Lord make this my prayer tonight..

2008-05-05T21:41:00.001+08:00

這天

2008-05-03T23:37:00.001+08:00

蘇打綠

夠深刻了嗎來躺下吧
讓我輕撫你安慰傷害我後的疲累
夠尖銳了嗎看我的疤
用溫柔包覆勇敢給喘息的你笑臉
生命從來不覺得自己對誰該負責任
太多虛偽情節的表面模糊陌生的眼
請讓我在你身邊一起穿越這條街
請讓我在你身邊一起紀念
夠痛快了嗎我知道啊
躲在你利刃之內驕傲的自卑作祟
夠鮮艷了嗎血染的花
被你刺滿的雙手此刻擦乾你眼淚
生命從來不覺得自己對誰該負責任
我們看了編造的謊言就如此輕易
將彼此劃成碎片
太多虛偽情節的表面模糊陌生的眼
請讓我在你身邊一起穿越這條街
請讓我在你身邊一起紀念這一天
總有一天我們都死去
丟掉名字的回憶再沒有意義
總有一天我們都忘記
曾為了一個越演越爛的故事傷心
總有一天我們都嘆息
笑著緬懷有過的愚蠢的美麗
就讓現在過去
讓我握你的手讓你握我的手
徹底了解顫抖你會知道我
讓我握你的手讓你握我的手
徹底了解顫抖你會知道我
讓我握你的手你會知道我
讓我在你身邊一起穿越這條街
請讓我在你身邊一起紀念這一天
透過我的眼淚看你的臉
自由是我們需要的特權
你笑了我笑了笑了這一天

2008-04-24T21:10:00.000+08:00

a letter..

2008-04-17T10:34:00.002+08:00

dear angel,

forgive me for the letter, mainly how scary it is. i thought it is the best way to do it, to venture a totally unknown language, communicating with you. & please, please at least shed 5 minutes for this, dont throw it into the bin straight away.

deep down in my heart, you are the first gal i fall for. it hard to say, i know u cant be seriously in love with me, but , as i always wish, u would look me in the eye & i can say the 3 words that really matter. it can change everything in our world.

anyway i know it doesn't matter now. i know from that day onwards our distance juz seem further away. you are a tough gal, i know u won't need any hands from me, as i am juz nobody, maybe a normal colleague to you. although i want to be the person supportin you, you juz dont seem willing. & i know maybe i pushin things too hard, that u are not really comfortable. so, i will jux leave you alone in the future. i know u definitely can take care of yourself.

so if u are willing, u can come talk to me, i will be always open. wish you all the best.

with love,
phile

a journey to remember

2008-03-31T08:39:00.003+08:00

ok so now i m here at the last day in australia.. after seeing alot smelling alot hearing alot, most of all thinking alot, i put myself in front of the com & start to rewind back...

i can certainly say i came here unprepared on day one. anyway taking it for granted is one of my expertize. i dont really know what to expect, when i arrived at the melbourne airport, i dont even know whether my friend will pick me up somewhere, but i think , at least i m safe & sound at the airport, who cares, i will walk on my own. ten minutes later, i hop on a bus to the city & ready to wait for my friend as instructed. seeing friends in foriegn land is like ecstasy, its make you too damn high, i cant tell you how much relieve when i, after a day on the plane, seeing my friends in real person. all the communication before hand seem strangely work. & straight after we were in a vietnamese?? restaurant havin a good time plus some delicacy.. ok i admitted till this point of time day one is pretty normal but what follow may even put some of your asleep.. but this is all important as i can really feel what the real melborne, the local version, is. fed square, train rides, local comedy fest, yarra river the city part, the i-forgot-what-the-name-it-was tower, oh ya, i nearly got to the MCG... afterwards i went to friend's place for bible study.. yes bible study.. thou shall not forget god anytime anywhere, know me?? haha shame to say, doze off a couple of time during that. meet some new friend though, meet up some of the old friend too. & then our last minute instinct get to us again, we talkin about what for tomorrow... pretty long & fruitless plannin come to an excellent choice, a drive to the great ocean road.

on day two, actually count it as day one b. we get up before dawn not to watch sunrise but to get ready the trip today. i cal that in the last 3 days i slept an astonishing 9 hours, wow. but the prospect of seeing something you never see in your life before juz get you goin, hehe.. get in the car & ready to roll. we set off from city melbourne, through geelong , via bell beach, to apollo bay, reach great ocean road. the great ocean road is juz --- great. i will never forget the sights along the way. now i know why people whether stay in small town instead of big city, to get the view other people cant get. & we hit twelve apostles, loch and gorge, the arch, the grotto, thunder cave, razor rock....a lot more. all are God blessings to man i can only say.. by the time we hit the last place its almost evenin, so knowin that we cant go any further we turn back home. we rushed back for some 'jurong get together' dinner, we managed to pull trina out. long time never see her... we had dinner in this italian restaurant & i gotta fight with this lasagna, man it is big & i almost cant finish it.

day three, the gruellin travel take its toll & i concussed until 1pm. stayed at friends place sorting thing out. i m ready sydney.

day four, first day i really on my own. as usual no planin what so ever, i head to the rocks visitor center for some research. from my hotel to the the rocks its like a walk down orchard road or nathan road.. but when i see what awaiting for me at the end of the road, its worth every aussie dollar i spent.. the sydney harbour bridge & the opera house standin, facin each other. tears almost out (a little over) & its juz spectacular. i walk one loop around the opera house & secretly admiring her... damn she is gorgeous... then i look over to the bridge & thinking.. bridge i m comin to conquer you tonight... ( no porno thought here alright) for the rest of the time till evening i stroll around the city, went to aquarium, QVB, brought some stuffs, & ready to take on the bridge. to my suprise they actually allow to take on the discovery tour instead of the normal one with no extra charges. thx mate. some standard procedures afterwards & bonding with the crews. the instructor called Doug & happened to be the most friendly Oz i ever met. the crews are all uncle & anuty but they are like young teens cheering around. after climb over 400 meters vertically up... i accomplished my fist goal of my life... many follows... haha

day 5, fighting my concussioness to get up as early as possible to get mine second day in sydney fruitful. but stil when i ready to go is a bit laggy on schedule... anyway... had da scrap the koala park when almost there & went straight to blue mountain. abit out of hand eventually reached there but everything seem fine when time passby. the shuttle bring me to the destination & breath-takin view follow... really appreciate australian taking care of their home so thoroughly.. i get to see what man should died protected view. from the guestbook in the visitor center of blue mountain : its God's creation.. after a few hours sight explosion, regretting why i didn't came earlier, i reluctantly drag myself on the train to city..

day 6, maybe the worst spent day in Oz but it really get me reflect alot. was on train back to melbourne from dusk till dawn.. was think about her all the time..

day 7, last day on Oz & spent most of the day shoppin on souvenirs in Melbourne..have an amazing dinner with enli & co. in his house, love the get-together, packed & ready to hit home..

so this is the Oz trip all alone by myself, i wanna enjoy every minute of it. i guess i did it & its really my first huge step to the world. the price : i leavin my comfort zone for first try. all the plannin before hands (if there is any) seem collabrate. thx God for the trip as HE really showered His blessin & peace unto me. something i thought i could never accomplish, i proundly done so. if there is another shot, hell yes...

p.s how i wish she would be there with me...

現代塵世美

2008-03-09T22:10:00.002+08:00

oh ya... juz come across this show... eason host..
he introduce tasmania
& then he said he feel like he is a child again
its make me think a lot

"and said, verily i say unto you, except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 18:3

ya i guess we should all humble our heart like little children, return into ur most sincerely
then we will see a better world

Here's our comprehensive look at the best ways to get the most out of your vacation.

2008-02-14T19:40:00.001+08:00

Take a photo of everything
Buy a digital camera (it'll change your life) and a big memory card (minimum 1 gigabyte). Snap pictures of where you parked your rental car, the ferry schedule, how full the gas tank was when you returned the car to the lot, and so on. You can always delete the photos later.

ATM? Credit cards? Traveler's checks?All of the above. To get cash, use an ATM. Your bank may have agreements with foreign banks; Bank of America, for one, belongs to the Global ATM Alliance, which means its customers can make free withdrawals from over 30,000 ATMs in eight countries. Use credit cards to make purchases (if you have more than one, figure out which has the lowest conversion fee). In some countries, they'll print your account number on the receipt, so don't blithely toss it in the trash. For emergencies, it helps to bring a few hundred dollars in traveler's checks.

Don't call home
There are ways to place calls cheaply from abroad, both with a cell phone and without (such as Skype). But unless you're traveling around the world for months on end, you don't really need to call. Create a Web-based e-mail account and keep in touch that way. You can go online at an Internet café for about $3 an hour. In the U.S., also look for libraries, which tend to have free access.

Almost every city has a transit pass
And it's always a better deal than buying á la carte.

Know your rights
If you're bumped from a domestic flight and you get onto another flight within one to two hours, the airline pays you the equivalent of a one-way fare ($200 max); more than two hours and you get up to $400. Vouchers are an option, too. If your checked bag is delayed, the airline covers expenses for toiletries and clothing until it delivers the bag to you. For a lost bag, the carrier must reimburse you, up to $3,000. If your hotel is overbooked, the hotel must find you a room at a comparable or better property nearby, at no extra charge.

Don't save the best for the last day
What if the weather takes a turn for the worse? What if you get sick? What if a giant meteor falls from the sky and lands right on your room? You'll wish that you had gone snorkeling earlier in your trip.

Nothing kills the fun like a long wait
For most major attractions, you can buy tickets online in advance. Also, in many cities there are passes that can be a great deal, especially because they let you skip to the head of the line. The big U.S. pass companies are CityPass and Go Card. The New York CityPass, for instance, costs $53 for adults - a smart value even if you're only going to three of the five attractions offered: the regular price for the Guggenheim Museum is $18; Circle Line Sightseeing Cruise, $24; American Museum of Natural History & Rose Center, $14; Empire State Building, $18; and Museum of Modern Art, $20.

Jet lag is inevitable
Human beings were not designed to fly halfway around the world. All you can really do is not drink alcohol on the plane, keep hydrated, get in synch with the new time zone as soon as you can, and exercise after landing (the last one is crucial).

"See you inside!"
Some popular museums - such as the Louvre in Paris - have more than one entrance; the lesser-known ones often have shorter lines. And for some attractions, you can buy tickets at places other than the end of a long line at the front door. Tickets for Versailles are available in advance at Fnac record stores in France and at fnac.com; in Rome, tickets purchased at the Palatine museum also let you walk right into the Colosseum.

A tax loophole for hunter-gatherers
When returning to the U.S., Americans may bring $800 of goods for personal use without having to pay duties or taxes. If you buy more than that, ship it home: You can send $200 of goods per day to yourself at a U.S. address. You can also send duty-free gifts worth up to $100 per person per day to people in the U.S. Bear in mind that shipping companies charge based on bulk or weight, whichever costs more, so pack efficiently.

Basic training
If the airport you're flying into is served by a train, take it if you're heading anywhere near the city center. Unless, of course, you're traveling in a group of three or more people, when a taxi is probably more cost-effective.

If you're going to complain, do it right
1. Speak up as soon as you have a problem. The longer you wait, the more the company will assume it wasn't that big of a deal.
2. Unsatisfied with the response? Politely ask for a supervisor. Never take "no" from someone who isn't empowered to say yes. The corollary is: Don't complain to anyone who can't help you. All that you're doing is ruining their day.
3. Even - or especially - if someone promises you the world, get it in writing.
4. Build a case! Take notes, keep receipts, get names. Your goal is to show that you really mean business.
5. When corresponding, do it by letter or e-mail. It beats calling, getting passed around, and telling your story over and over. But make copies before you send any originals.

rules of attraction

2008-02-10T20:09:00.000+08:00

Old rule: When it’s true love, you think about this person constantly

New rule: When it’s true love, thinking about this person makes you feel good

so now i guess i am that old person

i want to be new...

for now

2008-01-21T20:59:00.000+08:00

i think i found you...

its stil not clear but i know eventually

its shown..

i know i should wait abit more

but i dont know what u are thinkin

for now

i like u alot...

resolution

2007-12-31T09:57:00.000+08:00

ok so another year went pass...

lets set another year's resolution:

to love God more...( and again i set this, without fail i will fail this everyear..)

to love each & everyone ...( i guess i am not tt great after all)

to love the person i love, hate & ignore... ( ya as if u can do it)

so wish me luck ya...

p.s i brought myself a G9 for this year...lets see my fav...

reality check

2007-12-15T22:45:00.000+08:00

so i guess honeymoon is over. was told that i was slackin off in work recently. not exactly bad thing, someone gotta told u wat happen right?

but ( yup excuses were always in mind) am i really that bad.? or i juz cant meet ur usual high standard. u expect me to give u 100% everyday? so i juz happen to give 60, how about that?

anyway, i figure out this... i take in, be my normal self & go home, i dont work for u but i work for god & my own conscience, i agree but i dont change for the better, not for u but for my own integrity. simple as that.

thanks for inform me about this , its spice my life a little....

p.s i watched 'i am legend'

a letter from me

2007-12-08T08:23:00.000+08:00

dear santa,

its me again. your little nightmare. anyway you probably sick of me and i think this letter wont even reach you before you throw it away.

however this year, i have few points to make...

this is a quite fruitful year for me as i have so called finished my education & jumped into the society. i make a bunch of wonderful frenz & have a bit of unforgettable experience. i am pretty sure all this are NOT because of you, you big fat fraggot.

despite all the compliments & reputations you have all over these years, personally i still cant get over you, i was borned not to believe in you, & at some point of time i believe that you are that sick old man who interested in only children pantys. hopeless!

so, after all, i will list my wishes here, i dont care you grant it or not. i need a better life, why its fuckin 10years & they still stick in my backyard, is he dump or what? pls, go & get a life, they almost have wife & children for goodness sake, cant they just fuck off... be a man ... desperately, i need some fresh air... a breathin space & get rid of loneliness, ya i know i cant help it, but pls i dont wanna be only person alone in christmas...

fuck you.

yours

p.s i know its lil aggressive here, but spare me....

halloween

2007-10-31T23:41:00.000+08:00

trick -or - treat...
i cant believe i still into this sort of thing....
but as i grow older i find myself really head into that direction...
maybe coz i work in a place belong to the kids...

anyways its been 2 months since i m here ..
i feel like its been 20 years...
sometimes, most of the time...
i feel that loneliness devoured me like an animals....
evryday is in that damn fuckin routine
i started to feel the same way you feel...

so i apologise if i think u are wrong..
no you maybe , afterall, just expressin wat u feel

good night....

p.s its spooky feelin i think...

happy birthday

2007-10-08T09:48:00.000+08:00

ok

everything change... its weird that it seem different from now on... i dont know if ur will be meet again or its game over but i personally think it cant be done... i had used to it already... i m used to have all of us for dinner ... so for the first time i rejected the invitation. i juz hope that ur will be reconciled again & have that happily ever after...

p.s happy birthday

the long wait is over

2007-08-24T17:39:00.000+08:00

ok so the blog had rusted

the blog need a chatbox maybe

the blog is plain

nobody know i have a blog (not even u, the one reading this)

i got a job...

p.s if ur happen to drop here , say something idiot.... at least i know u're here....ok peace

its final chapter...

2007-07-07T10:30:00.000+08:00

normally i dont do entries in words... i suck in words, its cheesy & produce headache.. but since i cant picture wat i wanna say the following, maybe this is the only way...

everybody ask me why i dont wanna stay in s'pore... here's the truth... i dont like here at all... i always dont like here, but, a big BUT, i love the people i know here, i juz dont like the place... well, alot of people help me to grow here, i nv deny that they are all my best buds.... i m proud of them... i will always remember the things we did... but on the dark side i also thanks the people that i dont love... they help me to learn my lesson & help me to become stronger...

i 've been here around 10 years, its not a short time, most of my youth had been spent here.. but strangely, i dont miss here much.. i can let go.. so maybe juz maybe, when i come back, i will say, i miss ur guys... thats why i comeback...

so i juz wish everybody here can have their happily ever after.. coz i believe in fairy tale....

i realise i didn't say goodbye in this entries...

p.s transformer & die hard are comedy...

gambir 2007

2007-06-25T09:49:00.000+08:00

i know it may be little late now , but i m sure these are what u waitin for...

summoned the pianist....

the boss sure had something on his mind..

no shooting pls....
after hours negotiation, the star(right) finally agree to have a picture, with his manager....

the masters state-of-arty...

blah blah green sheep.....

the boss had his said after all...

missionaccomplish

p.s i will be gg back to work.... in hk....

they did it with ease

2007-05-24T10:20:00.000+08:00

btw. i juz reached devy jone's locker yesterday to rescrue jack...

its damn long 3hours...

Coins don't smell you do

2007-05-18T13:12:00.000+08:00

That metallic odor you smell after handling change? It's created by the breakdown of oils in skin after touching objects that contain iron. The chemical reaction has most of us running to wash our hands to get that musty scent out.

so the moral of the story...

dont blame the coin or dont use the coins...

you're pitiful

2007-04-28T17:03:00.000+08:00

question...

2007-04-11T16:58:00.000+08:00

1. Does anyone know your password to your email?- ya
2. What was the lastthing you ordered at McDonalds?- mcspicy...not my fav though
3. Are you an emotional person?- depend, will get emo when i am emo...
4. Do you like your name?- yes
5. Do you believe in love at firstsight?- no comment
6. Ever felt jealous of your friend?- for ? he got the newest toy in town??
7. What was the last thing you did?- reading this question
8. Who is right next to you?- nobody
9. Who was the last person you ate with?- my classmates
10. What song are you listening toright now?- smack that
11. How's the weather right now?- quit well, its creepy
12. Last person who called you today?- nobody
14. Last song you sang?- smack that
15. Last time you cried?- ???
16. Lost a friendship over something stupid?- to lose a friendship is stupid..
18. Last thing you ate?- some lousy-made fish & chip with wedges
19. Been really depressed before?- yup
20. Faked being sick to miss school?- hell yes
21.What time did u wake up today?- 845
22. Current taste?- u mean me...?? salty i think
23. Who is the person that posted this survey?- its bulleting
24. What are you wearing right now?- an awe orange tee
25. Are you too shy to ask anyone out?- why? unless that one person is really pretty
26. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?- whats u want me to say...boobs?
27. Where are you right now?- my room
29. Did you go anywhere today?- schhoool
30. What did you do there?- hang around to bore myself
31. How old are you?- 21
33. Are you mature or immature?- immature
34. Do you call your parents by their first name?- no i dont even call my parents...
35. Are you an only child?- nope
36. Where do you go shopping?- everywhere
37. Do you like where you work?- no screamin children & scary wife
38. Do you like books?- FHM ... yes
39. Any Plans for tomorrow?- finish up what are left
40. Current Emotional status?- emotionless
41. Current Mental status?- ok
42. Current Financial Status?- in bad debt
43. Any Plans for Christmas?- causally ask someone out & keep my night busy...??
44. Your Dreams for the future?- travel.. travel
45. What are going to do after this?- publish on my blog...

p.s shrek the third new trailer..

i am a dreamer

2007-03-14T00:06:00.000+08:00

i am a dreamer.
everytime when a dream start, i am excited. i know it'll be a good one & i'll enjoy it. i feel, i touch, i imagine your face. a flowin black hair, sparkling eyes, & who can forget ur sweetest smile. we'll be sittin in my favourite placed, hopin to be kissed. you always bring me surprises. together we travel across the horizon. one clicks of yours eyes & we'll be lost in time.
i dont wanna to be awake.
juz yet...

i dont know

2007-03-10T23:18:00.000+08:00

i dont understand
that we meant to meet each other
that we cross each other's path
that we pretend

i know
that i am a clown

but did u know
how much sorrow that i had to take
everytime i pretend to laugh

i juz want
to be understand
to be loved by everyone
that i love

i had not have this feelin
for a long long time...

no word

2007-03-02T13:18:00.000+08:00

finally its over

i cant bear one more single second of it

ya..ask me out ask me out... date me date me...

i am free as a bird... wahahahaha

i am goin crazy... no word can describe how i feel now...

lunar new year

2007-02-21T09:41:00.000+08:00

which school is so dumb that slot exams between holidays...?

i dont believe that they did...

i m doomed...

Surviving Valentine’s Day solo

2007-02-12T13:45:00.000+08:00

By Lori Gottlieb
Uh-oh. Just when you thought you’d gotten through New Year’s Eve unscathed, here comes another doozie of a holiday for singles: Valentine’s Day. For the uncoupled, the dreaded fourteenth day of February can be a pink-ribbon-and-teddy-bear-wrapped reminder (as if we needed one!) that we’ll be getting the entire bed to ourselves that night (again). Add to that the mall windows filled with heart-shaped balloons and the bombardment of ads from florists to jewelers, and Valentine’s Day can make you feel like you’re the only one who forgot to board Noah’s ark.

Well, take heart (so to speak): You are not alone. In fact, there are millions of other singles out there, each with his or her own strategy for getting through what might seem like the most unromantic day of the year—and maybe even having some fun. Here, some tactics to consider:

Denial: Denial may not be the smartest coping mechanism during the rest of the year (“Just because I found lipstick on his collar doesn’t mean he’s cheating, right?”), but on Valentine’s Day, it helps my single friends Gil and Heather. Gil says that by making fun of the holiday — “It’s a Hallmark invention” or “It’s a Pagan ritual” — he convinces himself that the day doesn’t have much true meaning. My friend Heather takes denial a step further. “They say loving yourself first is an important step to finding someone,” she explained. “It sounds cheesy, but one year friends and I got together for dinner to celebrate ourselves. We talked about the accomplishments we’d enjoyed since the last Valentine’s Day. Even if they were small things like new places we’d been, new foods we’d tried—anything that acknowledged that we’d grown in some way.” The result? “It was inspiring to take time to see what we have instead of what we’re missing. But I realize this also could be considered denial!”

Cruise for dates: Instead of pining away for a Valentine, my friend Marcelo decided to go out and find one. “One Valentine’s Day when I was single and lonely,” he said, “I went to the local Rite Aid to buy some sundries. I started talking to a cute girl who was also shopping. I figured, hey, she must be single if she’s shopping alone on Valentine’s Day. I asked her if she wanted to have dinner, since neither of us seemed to be busy that night, and she said yes.” Although it didn’t lead to a relationship, they had a nice time and wound up going out on a couple more dates. “Point is,” Marcelo said, “if you go out on Valentine’s Day and see a single person doing something incredibly mundane, then there is a good chance that person doesn’t have a significant other. The odds are markedly improved that if you ask the person for coffee or a drink, the answer will be yes.”

Pursue the impossible: A few years ago, when my friend Gil was hopelessly enamored of a neighbor whom he knew didn’t return his affection, he decided to ask her out anyway: “I got her this giant rose, in a box, wrapped in the biggest bow ever made, and invited her for dinner,” he said. And, it turns out, she accepted his offer. “Nothing ever came of that or many other gestures,” he admitted, sheepishly. But at least he got to spend the holiday with the woman of his dreams.

Help others: Sure, it’s easy to focus inward on our own romantic emptiness, but my friend Heather thinks reaching out should apply to Valentine’s Day as well. “On Thanksgiving, people go out of their way to make sure everyone has somewhere to go,” she said. “Why don’t we do that on Valentine’s Day, when we really need it? I want soup kitchens to hand out free pieces of pumpkin pie to single people on Valentine’s Day.” Well, perhaps not that exact idea, but giving those who’d appreciate it: Why not volunteer to do something nice for other people so that they feel loved—even if you don’t?

Revel: Two years ago, Bonnie decided to start a tradition of hosting a party attended only by her single friends. Not only is it a great opportunity to meet someone, but embracing the day feels empowering. My single friend Amy said that although she’d like to be coupled with the right person on Valentine’s Day, after spending the holiday with Mr. Wrong a few years ago, now she revels in being single rather than being with just anyone. “We had a very uncomfortable expensive romantic dinner,” she said of the guy she’d been dating. They broke up a week later. “I was so unhappy that Valentine’s Day, I remember thinking that it’s better to be single and happy than with someone just for the sake of being with someone,” she said.

Wear it on your sleeve: “I always wore red on Valentine's Day to show that I was embracing the holiday even though I was single,” said my friend Carolyn, who has since met and married her Valentine. “I thought that might save me from any ‘poor, pitiful single you’ comments and prevent anyone from tiptoeing around me that day fearing that I was feeling blue.” And it worked, Carolyn said: “How can anyone surmise that you’re feeling blue if you’re decked out in red?”

Be your own valentine: Another friend took matters into her own hands. “I always bought myself something absolutely lovely, like a thick cashmere sweater or a great beaded bracelet,” she said. “I have always been of the mindset that I love me and deserve to proclaim it to myself on February 14th, rather than to feel bad that someone else hasn't quite realized yet how terrific I am.”

The bottom line? Whatever strategy you choose, remember that Valentine’s Day isn’t all it’s cracked up to be anyway. Even if you have a Valentine (and especially if you’ve been together long enough that you’ve stopped closing the bathroom door), celebrating romance on a specific day each year tends to lose its luster. So just because you’re single doesn’t mean you’re missing much. Oh, wait, that must be my denial kicking in.

crossroad

2007-02-10T09:04:00.000+08:00

i am at the crossroad....

should i stay..

or should i go...

time will tell

but for now

lets play some footie...

& i wanna go olympic ..

cool

ya..

2007-02-02T10:27:00.000+08:00

ya... i forgot to add new zealand to do bungee

on my previous post...

i gotta backpack

2007-01-31T19:04:00.000+08:00

here is my plan to conquer the world,

2007 aussie
2008 beijing
2009 shangari-la
2010 indochina
2011 russia
2012 london
2013 hawaii/tahiti
2014 argentina/peru
2015 south africa
2016 europe

after that, u can kill me coz my dream had complete by then
call me philemon the great then...muhahhahahahaha

2007-01-10T09:31:00.001+08:00

How to plan that date

2007-01-09T00:12:00.000+08:00

Guys: How to plan that date

He says: The who, what, and when are easy. But after deciding to ask the who (a woman) out on the what (a date), and after picking the when (next Friday), we’ll have to start talking the where. If we want to show her a good time, we have to show her a good place. It’s a troubling detail, and I’ve often wondered if dating would be easier if it were mandatory to hold all first dates at a prescribed site. Someplace romantic but unthreatening. Like a candle shop. Or a mattress warehouse.

Nonetheless, we have options, and it’s the prudent dater who carefully considers them all before deciding which venue is the most likely to facilitate success in the romance department.

Let’s take a quick tour:

Starbucks. It’s often the first place that comes to mind, as in, “Let’s grab a cup of coffee.” The pros: If the date sours, you can end it without a waiter asking you if you’d like to see a dessert menu. Further, picking Starbucks in particular proves that you’re solvent enough — and employed enough — to drop a healthy ten-note on two flavored waters without batting an eye. It says, “I’m not a barista; on the contrary, baristas do my bidding.” The cons: If the date goes well, you either have to drink 19 cups of caffeine or propose that you continue the date somewhere else (like, say, the Starbucks next door).

An art gallery. Bad move. The only man who can look at a piece of art for more than 13 seconds and not appear to be faking interest is the guy who painted the thing. You don’t want your date to think you’re a total fraud. That comes later.

The zoo. Sure, it’s childish, but childish sometimes works. And meandering among primates provides a nice contrast to your own charms. It says, “Compared to these monkeys, I don’t throw feces.”

Dinner and a movie. Depends on the dinner. And the movie. And the woman. Spago, Being John Malkovich, and the girl you’ve been obsessed with for weeks? Maybe. KFC, Caligula, and the girl who’s been stalking you? Still maybe.

Movie and a dinner. You’ve no doubt committed the first date faux pas of “Let’s just catch a movie before dinner.” The premise is sound: Attend a cultural event and spend the next couple of hours discussing and dissecting it over a fine late-night meal. But inevitably what happens is you show up, say hello, and then spend the next two hours sitting silently next to this perfect stranger jockeying for elbow position while impossibly better-looking people rattle off impossibly better conversation 50 feet tall right before your eyes. Worse, in a mere two hours these matinee idols meet, fall in love, face a daunting romantic obstacle, and fall again back into each other’s arms as they motor off to Martinique. You, however, wrestle over the armrest and then motor off to the Olive Garden.

Your place. If you propose your place for your first date and she accepts, she obviously trusts you more than she should at that point. She’s trouble. Hang up. Run.

Her place. Hard to say. I’ve never mustered the courage to ask a woman out to her place, though I’ve been tempted. Often, when I pick up a woman at her doorstep, I’m amused by the thought that if all goes well — heck, if all goes stupendously — my ultimate goal is merely to return to this very spot… her doorstep. (Often, before I knock on her door, I’ll take a good look around—it’s still daylight, and in the best-case scenario, I’ll be returning to this spot well after the sun has gone down and moonlight will be the only illumination, so now’s my only chance to scope the place out. Case the joint, if you will.)

After all, the intervening hours between the pickup and the drop-off (or hookup) is but an exhausting, puddle-jumping sojourn from romantic restaurant to chichi bar to classic movie theater to late-night coffeehouse—a minimum three-hour tour whose only utility is to prove to my date that I have the capacity to squire her around the town and return her to her home-sweet-home without letting her be pillaged by pirates, kidnapped by renegade truckers, or audited by the IRS. In my hands, she’ll be unscathed by the cruel, cruel world. And as I turn the corner to her apartment building at the end of the night, see the staircase to her front door in the distance, and slow my car to a crawl on the approach, I’m desperate to interpret her subtle sighs and ministrations as a sign that I should stop the car instead of just letting it idle. That I should park, rather than double-park. Because at the end of the day, and the end of the date, if we men have done our jobs, if we’ve performed valiantly, we get to try our luck at a possible goodnight kiss at the place where it all began... her doorstep. The best venue of all.

happy new year

2007-01-01T00:32:00.000+08:00

my new year revolution...

-to love god more each day
-to be a better person
-to get in a serious relationship
-to be more lame
-to greet everyone i know a happy new year...\

had watched "the day after tomorrow", had many thoughts after that
please think...
from a giant mountain to a tiny ant, they each have a propose to exsist...
what is our propose, to destroy our own home...?
please act now, before its too late....

merry christmas

2006-12-25T23:12:00.000+08:00

its all go against me

i think its start after i came back... its all not well.. in the season of love.. i start to hate... i juz hate watever come to me.. i dont know why... its juz dont work.. if its the way to go.. i think i'll explore sooner or later.. i really mean it..i am angry..

its all fucked up...merry christmas

the re-up

2006-12-10T10:34:00.000+08:00

a letter for santa..

2006-11-29T09:18:00.000+08:00

dear santa,

hi, its me again. you remember the boy that cruse & swear last year? beg you dont, coz who wanna remember something that is bad... anyway i write to you this year again to like u know, say sorry & stuff like that...

anyway, i mentioned before that i dont believe in you.. but now i really need your help. i dont exactly know who to turn to except you. actually i want a winter christmas. i really want. i had been stuck in this hot & stuffy place for like 7 years. would u believe it, 7 stinky christmas. what do i get ? down on the orchard road, squeeze like a can sardine, for god sake they are sprayin foam at my face, eeeediot... the feelin is shit... what can we do, everywhere were pack with ppl, cant they enjoy their turkey at home...i seriously need a place that snow, quiet , & only me & my buddy...

so if its possible i ask for a trip to return home this christmas.... i know it'll pack & but at least the atmosphere is v diff, i really hope to...anyway one more thing, is it u are the one to promote love in the season... if it is, pls pls .... pls let me find my love in this christmas... i am sick & tire of being alone... i am a person... i cant stand being lonely year in, year out... my frenz always come in pair... but i am always alone... i hate the feelings u know...

ya these are the things i hope in this christmas... but once again... i know u wont be in much help... after all u are juz that big fat liar that cheat lil child year in, year out... ya peace, have a nice day & fuck off...

p.s i think i am not kiddin this year...

a lil story of mine

2006-11-23T23:22:00.000+08:00

was workin today... & something juz caught my eye
there were a couple of mum & daughter...
japanese i guess...came in
from the first look.. i went blank
& then, from the second glance to fallin in love with her...
i juz took 3 second.. & ...
& while i stunned... i served her with a smile...
which i thought was, real fake..
anyway... she looked at this bag..
& asked me to put it back...
& she was gone... out forever in my life...
& i came back to reality...

P.s thx felix for the picture..

JB

2006-11-18T00:52:00.000+08:00

was at jb today. shoppin & haircut. not a classic trip after all.
anyway is cool to get together with bud & play along.

gonna work next week onward, old stuff.
may be get a lil bit cash to make my plan come thru
hehe i will be back

i feel its time to do something abt it...

back

2006-11-14T23:07:00.000+08:00

i m back. stronger. this 4 months had been a mind blowin experience for me.... feelin i m blessed. but there is long way to go ahead...